Guide on How to Fail at Online Dating - Chapter 19
Due to the posture, Jinghuan turned her head and could only see the other person’s ear.
They were very close, and he could still smell the faint scent of soap on the other person.
« No need to thank me, » the person behind said, « Can you get up now? »
Jing Huan was momentarily stunned, and only after confirming that the cockroach had completely disappeared did she dare to stand up straight.
« Sorry about that. » He turned around and finally got a clear look at the unlucky classmate he had bumped into.
Single eyelids, a high nose bridge, wearing a black T-shirt, standing on a lower step but still able to look him straight in the eye.
Jing Huan stared at the boy’s face for a few seconds before remembering to ask, « So, um, I didn’t hurt you, did I? »
« No. » Xiang Huaizhi also glanced at him a few more times.
That boy has unusually long eyelashes.
« That’s good, I just lost my balance. » Jing Huan was too embarrassed to admit that he was scared by the bug.
Xiang Huaizhi actually watched the whole thing and clearly saw how he was trying to shift the blame. He nodded, « Hmm, can you move aside? »
Now Jing Huan was taking up one side, and his blame was taking up the other, almost blocking the entire hallway.
« Oh, alright. » Jing Huan immediately gave up his seat; he was never going to touch that pot again anyway.
Xiang Huaizhi was about to go upstairs when someone grabbed his clothes.
Classmate, wait. » Jing Huan said, « That bump just now was pretty hard. If you feel uncomfortable anywhere later, come find me in dorm 312.
Xiang Huaizhi nodded, « Got it. »
Watching her benefactor leave, Jing Huan stared at the pot on the ground, worried about what to do next. When she looked up, her gaze met that of two familiar people.
Gao Zixiang and Lu Wenhao were standing on the balcony of the third floor, peering through the stairwell window in his direction. They didn’t know how long they had been watching, but when they saw Jing Huan notice them, the two instinctively tried to hide.
Jing Huan sneered coldly, raised her hand, first pointing at Gao Zixiang, then at Lu Wenhao.
—You, and you.
Then he put his hands together and made a throat-slitting gesture on his neck.
— Everyone must die.
Lu Wenhao: « …… »
Gao Zixiang: « …… »
The two of them pressed their heads against the railing and banged their heads repeatedly.
Finally, the dorm supervisor auntie heard the noise, came over, confiscated the pot, and warned Jing Huan a few times, saying that the school strictly forbids students from cooking in the dormitory.
The ingredients were all bought, and if they weren’t cooked tonight, they would spoil. Jing Huan stood on the stairs, comforting herself for quite a while before moving towards the convenience store outside the school gate.
After buying a pot and returning, just as she opened the dorm door, she saw the simple dining table filled with cleaned and sliced raw meat and vegetables arranged on plates. The beer was also poured, and Jing Huan’s glass was decorated with a cherry on the rim.
Big brother, you’re back. » Gao Zixiang quickly walked to the door, striking a welcoming pose. « The little brothers have been waiting for you for a long time!
Lu Wenhao stood by the dining table: « Welcome, big brother, please take your seat! »
Jing Huan’s little anger had already been worn out on the way: « …idiot. »
The three had agreed on WeChat that Jing Huan would buy the groceries and wine, and the two of them would wash the vegetables and dishes. Since they were in the wrong, Gao Zixiang felt justified: « Yes, yes, yes, we are idiots. You sit down, don’t get sick from anger, or Hao’er and I won’t be able to compensate. »
Jing Huan laughed angrily: « Enough, move aside, sit in your own seat. »
The three of them took their seats.
Thinking about that scene just now, Lu Wenhao was still terrified: « Damn, the steps in this crappy dormitory are so high. If you really fall down and get hurt, then I’ll have no choice but to devote myself to you. »
Jing Huan: « No, just compensate me, I’m not interested in 36D. »
That’s perfect, I don’t want to massage you anyway. » Lu Wenhao poured in the hot pot base, « But Xiang Huaizhi is pretty impressive. You bumped into him like that, and he still stood so firmly. Didn’t they say his leg was injured?
Gao Zixiang: « That was a long time ago; it’s probably fully healed by now. »
Jing Huan: « Xiang Huaizhi? Who? »
« You are my lifesaver, the man who just stood behind you. » Gao Zixiang handed him the chili pepper, « You don’t know him? »
Jing Huan thought for a moment: « Is he from our department? »
« No, he’s from the neighboring department, a junior senior. He moved into our building this semester, living upstairs in room 522. » Gao Zixiang said, « Oh right, you don’t often go to the basketball court at the west gate, so you probably haven’t met him. He’s insanely good at basketball. »
They say he’s a top student, but the key is… » Lu Wenhao dragged out the last word, « he’s really handsome, a campus celebrity, I thought you knew him.
« Sorry, campus celebrity, I only know myself. » The spicy soup in the pot was already boiling. Jing Huan had specially bought a different pot from before, finally whetting his appetite. As he spoke, he picked up a piece of tripe and dipped it in to cook.
So full of yourself. » Gao Zixiang laughed at him but didn’t argue, « Then, celebrity, why exactly did you come back to play Nine Heroes with us?
Jing Huan paused, « Why bring this up all of a sudden? »
Where did that suddenly come from? We agreed before that the three of us would go for the full-server PK together, and it hasn’t happened for over a year! » Gao Zixiang recalled something, « Besides, I heard that this year they will add some really awesome full-server PK rewards.
Jing Huan: « Where did you hear that? »
My guild leader knows someone inside the game.
Such news is mostly fake, so Jing Huan didn’t pay much attention and just said, « We’ll talk about it later, I’m busy recently. »
Gao Zixiang nodded: « If I hadn’t seen your schedule, I almost would have believed you. »
I really don’t have time.
Then tell me, what are you busy with?
Busy chasing after scumbags.
Jing Huan took a sip of wine and said, « Anyway, I’m just busy. I’ll deal with it after I’m done. »
After eating and drinking his fill, Jing Huan repeatedly warned the two not to lend out the pot before leaving the dormitory.
He had only taken a couple of steps when, as if compelled by some force, he glanced up at room 522 upstairs.
Outside the door of room 522, hanging on the clothes drying rod, was a pair of colorful underwear. Jing Huan squinted to take a closer look and finally saw that the underwear was decorated with Pikachu in various poses.
…Can’t tell at all, his benefactor’s eyes aren’t big, but he’s quite flirtatious.
—
Jing Huan returned home and had just started the game when the friend message notifications kept flashing nonstop.
[Friend] Energetic Little Mosquito: Sister, good news!
[Friend] Sweet Jing: Huh?
[Friend] Energetic Little Mosquito: The Idle Pavilion is no longer hunting you!
Jing Huan was momentarily stunned. He looked around and only then realized that the familiar faces who usually logged in just to wait for him were all absent today.
[Friend] Little Sweet Jing: Why is that?
[Friend] Energetic Little Mosquito: Uh… I’m not really sure either. The leader directly posted a guild announcement saying we should all work together to gather materials and not waste time on you.
Jing Huan twitched the corner of his mouth. Who exactly is wasting whose time?!
But that’s fine too, he still has important matters to attend to, and being chased is indeed troublesome.
He went outside the city to complete two daily tasks, the journey was smooth, and he was even a bit unaccustomed to it.
[Friend] Lu Tiaotiao: Are you there?
[Friend] Xiao Tianjing: I’m here, what’s up?
[Friend] Lu Tiaotiao: Next session? A twenty-player game, and your beloved is also in it.
[Friend] Xiao Tianjing: I want to join!!!
[Friend] Xiao Tianjing: [Cheering] Where do we meet?
Everyone’s here, » Lu Hang said, « Let’s go, matchmaker is gathering.
Xiang Huaizhi Gang flew to the Matchmaker and saw the little sweet scene beside him.
He said nothing and applied to enter the quest.
[Yearning to join the Second Young Master’s Marriage Quest.]
[Little Sweet Scene joined the Second Young Master’s Marriage Quest.]
[Team] Lu Tiaotiao: Is everyone ready? OK, I’ll start the chapter.
[Team] Love is Sharing with You: 1
[Team] Born Peach: …1
[Team] Chun Xiao: .
[Team] Lovesickness disregarded:……
[Team] Little Sweet Scene:……0x0
The other members in the group couldn’t help but exclaim in their hearts, what the hell kind of death train is this!!
……Are these few people going to start fighting while working?!
[Team] Lu Tiaotiao: Let’s be clear, any high-level materials dropped will be shared as dividends among team members, and for good items dropped, we’ll roll dice to decide. If anyone has objections, you can leave the team now.
This is the default rule for large-scale dungeons. After half a minute, if no one speaks up, meaning no objections, Lu Hang will start the dungeon.
The « Second Young Master’s Wedding » dungeon can only be triggered by using a « Mysterious Invitation. » Obtaining the « Mysterious Invitation » is purely based on luck; sometimes, after completing the dungeon, there is a very small chance it will drop. Lu Hang had just gotten an invitation this afternoon and immediately rushed to start the dungeon.
Although the dungeon isn’t very difficult, the process is very tedious. Worried that random players might be unreliable, he only invited people from his friends list.
There was an eerie silence in the team’s chat channel; no one spoke. The first stage of the dungeon was a solo item-finding task, and the twenty players quickly completed it, immediately switching to the next round of tasks.
As soon as he entered the portal, Jing Huan’s game interface suddenly changed, and he was pulled into a special scene outside the residence of the Second Young Master.
[Guard at the door: « Little Sweet Jing, » you look very unfamiliar! Since you claim to be the Second Young Master’s tutor, let me test you.]
Jing Huan had found this dungeon annoying before and had never run it. Unprepared, he clicked on the « Okay! » option.
[Gate Guard: May I ask what type of waste wet wipes belong to?]
Jing Huan: « …… »
Jing Huan: « ? »
This crappy game is way too up-to-date.
The headset was silent. Maybe everyone was lazy, or perhaps they knew someone in the team was at odds with Xiao Tianjing and didn’t dare to break the strange atmosphere. No one spoke in the dungeon team’s voice channel, and no one gave him any prompts.
Jing Huan glanced at the answer and breathed a sigh of relief. Fortunately, the answer was obvious.
He chose « wet waste » without hesitation.
[Guard at the door: Someone! Drive away this impostor!]
Jing Huan: « ?? »
[Team] Love is Sharing: Wet wipes are dry waste…
[Team] Little Sweet Scene: …??
[Team] Little Sweet Scene: How do you know what I chose [shocked]
[Team] Lu Tiaotiao: This is a random segment, a player is randomly selected to challenge, and the rest of the players wait in place.
[Team] Little Sweet Scene: ……
[Team] Little Sweet Scene: What does it mean?
[Team] Long Road Ahead: Yes, we’re all watching you. But it’s okay, there’s no limit to the number of attempts for this quiz. Keep it up! [Cheering]
[Team] Little Sweet Scene: ……..Alright then! [Smile]
[Gate Guard: May I ask, in the first stage of the dungeon, how many items did you find in total?
a. 71 items
b. 99 items
c. 69 items
d. Video Playback】
Who can remember that? Jing Huan directly clicked on the video playback.
[Guard at the door: No playback! Someone! Drive away this impostor!]
Jing Huan took a deep breath.
[Guard at the door: May I ask, what is the name of the girl who has been waiting painfully for her lover’s return at « Liuxi River »?]
Liuxi River Scene, Jinghuan knew, was a wild map among the Nine Heroes, and indeed there was a young female NPC.
What was her name again??
Just in case, Jinghuan specially searched on Baidu, and immediately saw the three characters « Liu Daniu. » To save everyone’s time, he quickly switched back to the game and clicked on the « Liu Daniu » option.
[Gate Guard: Someone! Drive away this impostor!]
Jing Huan: « …?!! »
[Team] Xiangsi Bugù: You answered this question as Aunt Liu?! Didn’t you see the word « girl »?? Are you doing this on purpose? Intentionally burning our game time? [Question]
What’s going on? Is this crappy Baidu trying to scam people?
Jing Huan switched back to the webpage to take a look.
[Netizen’s answer: First of all, let’s rule out the option « Aunt Liu, » since the age doesn’t match.]????
A question you can tell just by glancing at the raw photo, and you still insist on forcefully analyzing it?!
[Team] Lovesickness No Matter What: I want to see how many of your questions you can answer correctly.
If you can do it, then go ahead!?
Jing Huan angrily pressed down the guard at the door.
[Door Guard: What is the next line after « The waterfall plunges straight down three thousand feet »?]
…Finally met someone who knows it.
While recalling, Jing Huan couldn’t help but mutter softly, « The waterfall plunges straight down three thousand feet… »
« Not as heartfelt as Wang Lun’s farewell to me. » A familiar voice came through the earphones, with a hint of teasing.
Yes, yes, that’s the one.
Jing Huan instinctively made the corresponding choice following that sentence.
[Guard at the door: Someone! Drive away this impostor!]
[Team] Love is Sharing Your Food:……
[Team] Spring Xiao:……
[Team] Lovesickness Regardless:……
[Team] Destiny Zhi Zhi Tao Tao:……
Xiang Huai gave a very brief laugh: « …You actually believe that? »
Jing Huan: « …… »
What kind of trash are you?
