First Kiss Diary - Chapter 44

Actually, Ji Ning hadn’t intended to attend this event.

But before every event, the organizers check with the artists’ teams whether they’ll be present so they can present the appropriate awards. If an artist won’t show, the award is given to someone else to avoid an awkward empty moment during the ceremony.

The organizers told Nono she had an award tonight. Ji Ning figured since she was going to get some rest anyway, she might as well come by and pick up a prize. It wasn’t a particularly heavyweight award, but something is better than nothing.

By the time the promo reel finished playing in the little theater in her head, Ji Ning turned to enter and unexpectedly noticed that the atmosphere beside her felt a bit strange.

Ji Shiyan had taken off his suit jacket; now wearing a white shirt, that face—already seeming somewhat otherworldly—looked even colder. Coupled with a slightly hostile gaze, he exuded a highly oppressive aura.

Zhuo Gong’s eyes landed on her shoulder; he was not as aggressive as the other man, but he hid a stubborn streak, like an athlete unexpectedly called to run the 800 meters at the last minute—unsure if he could win, but brimming with determination.

She naturally recalled that the film had just mentioned awarding certain prizes for Best Actor.

Everyone here was surely, like her, aiming to win awards. By chance, both of them were very career-driven: Zhuo Gong refused to be beaten, and Ji Shiyan was the senior, so of course sparks were bound to fly between them over some of the better prizes.

That’s normal.

She didn’t say much either, and walked toward the awards area.

It was oddly familiar; this time it was Zhuo Gong and Ji Shiyan sitting next to her again.

Halfway through the awards she remembered something and tugged off her coat to hand it to Ji Shiyan.

At that moment the man was resting his chin on his hand, lost in thought. Seeing her hand him a coat, he asked, “What is it?”

Ji Ning said, “If you end up winning later, you’ll put the jacket on to go onstage, right?”

“No need,” he replied nonchalantly. “I won’t win.”

No win? If he wasn’t winning, then what was he even here for?

“Already confirmed?” Ji Ning could hardly believe her idol had no awards tonight; not asking for a grand slam, how could he not win a single prize?

“He had them before; I pushed them away.”

The man’s gaze casually swept over the person beside her. “I thought the junior needed encouragement more.”

Zhuo Gong suddenly felt belittled: ???

Zhuo Gong thought: why should my winning be called encouragement? That was earned with real talent and acting, all right? Does Ji Shiyan not need encouragement?

Thinking it over, oh—he’s even won two international awards; it seems he doesn’t really need encouragement.

The young man slapped the armrest and snorted through his nose.

So what if he can’t beat him? He still wants to try. The creed of their youth is never give up.

Ji Ning hadn’t been sitting long when an award for viewership ratings was presented, and the whole crew of “Rose” went up on stage.

Although the whole crew deserved credit, only three trophies were prepared—one each for the male and female leads and the director—so the point had been made.

She went back to her seat and couldn’t help loosening the muscles in her lower back; after all, there probably wouldn’t be much for her later—she’d already received one of the latter awards, and the further back an award is, the more prestigious it tends to be.

She hadn’t even had time to get comfortable when, upon announcing the most popular actress, it was her award again.

He hadn’t expected to win two. Ji Ning hadn’t even prepared any words; everything he wanted to say had already been said, and after a moment he managed to squeeze out a few remarks, then went offstage holding the trophy.

Good thing she hadn’t yawned from tiredness before the last award was announced.

Because the camera turned to her again—this award included her as well.

There was a murmur of discussion in the audience, but it quickly quieted down with the host’s introduction.

“In fact, behind every successful show there are many behind-the-scenes people working hard, and voice actors are indispensable. They too can enrich a character, can work tirelessly for a role, and sometimes give their all for certain scenes. It’s unfortunate they haven’t been seen by everyone yet, but it’s gratifying that they are gradually being recognized.”

All the people on stage were voice actors from popular dramas. Except for Ji Ning, who used her own voice in the TV series, the other leads all had their own dubbers.

But she was also the kind of person her manager had told, “You’d be better off taking more roles than learning dubbing,” and she had been mocked by peers as someone who “only does pointless work.” Yet it was precisely her seemingly clumsy and stubborn choice, her headstrong persistence, that led to where she is today.

Standing on the stage now, she suddenly felt a bit proud, convinced that her past efforts were not wasted, only in need of time to settle. She was equally proud that the person she loved was Ji Shiyan.

Because of him, she learned what professional conduct an actor should have; he opened for her a world that was harsher, but also far broader.

He made her better, and that is the meaning of being a fan.

Ji Ning politely let the other voice actors speak first. The last girl was probably too excited; by the end she couldn’t stop choking up. After she finished speaking she kept holding the microphone and repeatedly trying to steady herself.

The people nearby saw Ji Ning had waited too long and hurriedly said to her, “It’s your turn now, take the microphone.”

There weren’t enough microphones on stage; they had to be passed around.

Ji Ning took the microphone handed to her with both hands, pressed her lips together, and said, “I’m very grateful for this recognition. Although I know I still have a long way to go before I’m perfect, at least this will give me a little more motivation and courage to carry on. I hope that in the future, when people mention Ji Ning, the first thing that comes to mind won’t be her persona or variety shows, but the genuine, deeply affecting characters she has brought to life.”

Applause swelled from the audience. Ji Shiyan watched her on stage, brilliant lights circling around her; she was beautiful, she was resilient, she had her own orbit and direction.

She was like a star—the darker the sky, the more clearly one could see her brightness.

///

Ji Ning hadn’t expected that even on days like this, Chong Fei wouldn’t leave her alone.

Because she had been busy filming and recording variety shows lately and rarely went out, there were far fewer gossips about Chong Fei; most of them were harmless bits of archaeology.

But seeing that she came out today, Zhong Fei, as the head of several major hate accounts, of course had to join the fun and posted a video of the acceptance speech after her dubbing award.

Zhong Fei certainly wasn’t there to congratulate her, because the caption of the video was blatantly pointed: Protecting the world’s most beloved microphone, our Ning!

During these days while the case was awaiting court trial, Zhong Fei had behaved a bit more wisely and stopped using the derogatory name “Ning.”

The video was an edited clip with the beginning and end cut off; the edit conveniently started right after the previous winner finished speaking: the previous girl was still choking up, Ji Ning reached out, the girl handed her the microphone, and she began to speak.

At first glance, it really looked like the previous person hadn’t even had a chance to speak before Ji Ning, relying on his celebrity privilege, grabbed the microphone from the girl’s hand.

Moreover, judging from the captions, Chong Fei was indeed steering it in that direction.

The comments below were livelier than setting off firecrackers at New Year at home:

[Oh my, Ning is taking advantage of there being no live stream to do whatever he wants now. Has his previously cultivated “peaceful, noncompetitive fairy” image collapsed~]

[Can fans still close their eyes and praise Ji Ning as amazing? I don’t think so.]

[Ning: Waited so long, crying like this and not saying a word, so annoying — fine, I’ll speak. Who hears my voice and doesn’t want to sleep with me?]

Although the awards ceremony wasn’t streamed live, the official Weibo account posted announcements naming some winners; some awards for unknown reasons weren’t publicized. In any case, the official account only posted one notice about Ji Ning winning an award.

So a hater immediately seized on this: [Didn’t she win the Popular Actress award? She should have finished speaking ages ago — why is she still talking? Could she have won three awards??? I really admire this attention-seeking PR move; it’s making me want to vomit my dinner.]

Someone replied sarcastically: “What do you know? We’re so good at being fake and putting on acts and so good at acting coy that of course we deserve to win all three awards! If we didn’t win all three, how could anyone possibly be worthy of her?”

[How can she talk nonstop like that all night? Doesn’t she need throat lozenges? Fans hype her endorsements as amazing—get her a throat-soothing endorsement already.]

A few troll accounts and marketing accounts coordinated, and the topic’s heat immediately spiked.

Ji Ning had just returned to the hotel when she saw the topic climbing the trending list. There was no time to think of a response when she noticed the organizers’ official Weibo had posted about it.

The official account first posted the full list of award winners, then, in the comments, called out several artists who had won multiple awards—Ji Ning was of course among them.

Then the official account, somehow having obtained the full award ceremony video, uploaded it to Weibo.

Black fans never expected the organizers to release the video—this meant their so-called dirt would soon be exposed as a lie.

But it wasn’t over yet: a brand deal Ji Ning had previously agreed to was scheduled to be announced tonight, and they immediately posted the collaboration on Weibo.

[New packaging, new beginning. Next, we proudly introduce our new spokesperson Ji Ning. Welcome to the Qinran family—please take good care of him in the days to come.]

Qinran is a leader in the international candy industry and one of the world’s largest sellers of compressed candies, with nationwide recognition. From international supermarkets to street-side stalls, there’s nowhere that doesn’t stock their sweets.

Of course, most importantly, Qinran’s throat lozenges are also very famous. 🙂

The super fans in Ji Ning’s fan forum were dying laughing:

[“What gives her the right to keep talking — did she win three awards??” “Let’s congratulate Little Ears for taking home three awards tonight!!” “Talking so much, shouldn’t she take some throat lozenges? Isn’t she so awesome, bring on some endorsements!” “Congratulations to Ji Ning on officially becoming Qinran’s new ambassador, please take good care of her from now on!” Damn, tonight my happiness is courtesy of the haters.]

[Hapinin Hei, publicly embarrassed online.]

[Gah hahaha stop posting, I’m laughing so hard I’m drooling.]

[I think Ning Hei is playing the prophet card tonight.]

Another superfan, using the calmest tone to say the most provocative thing: [Won three awards plus a national endorsement, all kinds of ads will flood online and offline soon. No need to fight the smear—there’ll be official denials. Good thing this is my baby, or I’d have died hugging a lemon ages ago.]

[Sorry, tonight I’m not just going to close my eyes and praise Ji Ning’s badassery, I’m also going to twirl like a whirlwind top to the waltz of love, lift my skirt, and then, without losing elegance, pull two thumbs out of my pocket and loudly acclaim: Ji Ning is fucking awesome!!]

[I slowly typed out a string: “Red hot and prosperous, He Houhua, still good, still good, dazed and delirious”]

[You think messing with Ji Ning is satisfying? No, the pleasure of messing with Ji Ning is something you can’t even imagine.]

[Long time no see, Heizi. Don’t say I haven’t missed you these past few days; as it turns out, absence really does make the heart grow fonder—they’re even dumber than before.]

Qin Ran quickly bought trending promotion for the new endorser, and some haters immediately rushed to post vulgar comments below, earning themselves a severe clamping down from many people.

[If you click in and see she followed Zhong Fei, then it’s not surprising she said those things. I feel like some people there are like lunatics; they can smear Ji Ning for even drinking water…]

[szd, her anti-fans really don’t seem very smart or sane. (I’m not a fan)]

[Wasn’t the video posted tonight already debunked? It was said she stole the spotlight, but I watched the actual footage — she was the one who handed the microphone to someone else, right? Zhong Fei posts so many fake edits, so why do people still follow her?]

Many people see a bit of brainwashing material and start slamming it. Even if you shove the truth into their heads, they’d rather rip their brains out than look at it. That’s just who they are. It’s exhausting to face the truth; it’s so much more satisfying to mouth off.

I used to follow Chong Fei too, but gradually it felt off so I unfollowed. Some of the stuff was really over the line and seriously misrepresented. After watching ‘The Rose’ I changed my view of Ji Ning—everyone’s life is hard, so be kinder, or bad karma will come back to you.

Gradually there were bystanders speaking up for her, and there were haters breaking away from Chong Fei.

Her fan circle no longer collapses into despair and powerlessness at the first hint of scandal; now they can even laugh and tease the haters and some of the accusations.

It seems that over these past few months, she hasn’t been the only one to grow and grow stronger.

She believed that the rumors and slanders that couldn’t bring her down would, in the end, become the cloud-step ladder she would step on as she soared upward.

Author’s note: Boo-hoo, my little nurturing treasure Ning, Mama will love you for ten thousand years!!