**54**
A group of seven or eight people, all familiar to Chi Sheng, including the senior who had competed with her for the competition spot.
Chi Sheng’s eyelid twitched sharply, but she didn’t stop walking and continued forward. Her face showed a mix of surprise and joy. She turned slightly to the side, waiting for them to catch up before casually asking, “What are you all doing here?”
Su Miaomiao habitually ran up beside Chi Sheng and said irritably, “We just pulled an all-nighter and came back to school.”
Zhang Lie also leaned over, excitedly patting Chi Sheng: “We were just saying how unfair you are for not coming when we rarely get together, and then you show up.”
They stayed up all night, but were still full of energy, chattering away about how Chi Sheng was being unfair, saying how much fun they had, and that Chi Sheng definitely couldn’t miss the next time.
Chi Sheng joked along with them, acting exactly as usual, but quickened his pace, leading them away from there.
The senior glanced back, looking at the gate of the community where Chi Sheng came from for a few seconds. Then he suddenly smiled and interjected, “Do you live around here?”
Chi Sheng’s eyelid twitched, and he didn’t respond immediately.
Zhang Lie thought they didn’t know each other, so he enthusiastically introduced, “Chi Sheng, this is Senior Tao Ping, he’s also from our school, two grades ahead of us.”
With the topic changed like this, the previous question was brushed aside. Chi Sheng took the opportunity to say, “We know each other; we just met the day before yesterday.”
Senior Tao Ping laughed. With his refined appearance and full of friendliness, he explained to the confused crowd, “We are all students of Teacher Kang.”
Everyone suddenly understood. Su Miaomiao excitedly said, “Is it that competition?”
Tao Ping, like a caring senior looking out for juniors, patiently explained, “We will know the number of participants today. Chi Sheng has high hopes; Teacher Kang appreciates her very much.”
He was talking to others, but his gaze kept occasionally sweeping over to Chi Sheng, which made Chi Sheng feel uncomfortable.
“Such a big good thing, and you didn’t tell us,” someone said.
Zhang Lie also complained, “Since you left with that girl during summer vacation, you haven’t played with us.”
He unexpectedly mentioned Ruan Yinmeng, causing Chi Sheng to panic. Instinctively, he paid attention to the reactions of others, but his face showed no concern as he changed the subject.
The group arrived at the school gate, chatting and laughing, then went their separate ways—those returning to the dorm went back, and those heading to class went to class.
Chi Sheng arrived at the classroom and listened to the lesson absentmindedly for a while, but his chest felt as if a heavy stone was pressing down on it.
After class, she suddenly remembered something and grabbed a girl beside her to ask if people often went to the street on Beihu South Road. The girl replied, “Yeah, there are lots of shops and internet cafes there. Students around here love to hang out there.”
Chi Sheng released her hand and stood there stunned for a moment, feeling as if all the blood in her body had turned cold. To get to Beihu South Road, one had to pass by the residential complex where Ruan Yinmeng lived.
Could it be that she had already been seen by someone many times?
The thought had just surfaced when she forcefully suppressed it herself.
If they ran into each other, so be it. She and Ruan Yinmeng never had any inappropriate behavior outside, so even if they were caught, there was nothing to be afraid of.
Chi Sheng realized that since her eighteenth birthday, this feeling of anxiety had followed her like a shadow, constantly nagging at her.
She would tell herself that there was nothing shameful between them, but she also understood that if anyone found out, it could be disastrous for her.
After the last class in the afternoon, she went to Teacher Kang’s office. The senior sister was already there, and Tao Ping arrived a little later.
Everyone has arrived.
“I, along with several teachers, evaluated and finally unanimously decided that Zhou Wen and Chi Sheng better meet the competition requirements.”
This good news finally cheered Chi Sheng up a bit. She left the office and immediately edited a text message to share the good news with Ruan Yinmeng.
Tao Ping followed her all the way from behind, only leaving from another direction when they reached the teaching building.
In the following period, Chi Sheng spent most of her time in the studio. Having spent a lot of time with senior Zhou Wen, she gradually became more familiar with her.
Zhou Wen is two grades ahead of her, with a mature temperament and appearance, but she likes to tease her: “They all say you don’t like to pay attention to people, very proud, but it turns out you’re so fun once you get to know you.”
Chi Sheng didn’t know what was so fun about it. She buried herself in painting, going home less often, but she never missed a daily phone call, though the conversations were kept very brief.
She missed her deeply; this kind of communication through the phone was gradually no longer enough to soothe her.
She always felt like a small boat tossed in a storm, uneasy and unstable. The more unsettled she felt, the more she longed for Ruan Yinmeng—her voice, her body, the way she looked at her.
So one night, she held a paintbrush and kept painting, but grew increasingly restless.
It was a sudden decision, made without thinking or deliberation. She dropped the brush and ran outside.
On a cold winter night, she ran until she was sweating all over. When she entered the house, she was gasping for breath. Ruan Yinmeng had already gone to bed and was startled by her sudden arrival. She quickly got out of bed and poured her some hot water to drink.
When Chi Sheng saw her, the feeling of turmoil and instability settled down.
Ruan Yinmeng often said her eyes were very pure, calling her a little sun, but at some point, Chi Sheng felt that Ruan Yinmeng had become her pillar of strength; only with her around could she feel at ease.
“Aren’t you supposed to be painting?” Ruan Yinmeng asked with concern as she watched her finish a glass of water.
Chi Sheng didn’t answer, reaching out to wrap her arms around Ruan Yinmeng’s waist. Ruan Yinmeng fell silent, slowly stroking her hair.
“When I graduate, everything will be fine.” She suddenly had this thought. Once she graduated, there would be fewer restrictions. They just had to hold on until then.
Thinking this way, she seemed to have found some hope, like a senior high school student looking forward to getting through the college entrance exam. She had found that point where, once she got through it, everything would go smoothly.
“When I graduate…” she said involuntarily.
Ruan Yinmeng’s hand paused but she didn’t ask how things would be after graduation. She just softly agreed, “Okay, wait until you graduate.”
But it seemed that fate did not want her to continue living in comfort.
A few days later, Chi Sheng suddenly noticed that the people around her were looking at her strangely, as if whispering and gossiping about something. When she looked back, they quickly averted their eyes, and the murmuring stopped.
The gossip and stares were like a net, impenetrably dense, following her wherever she went.
She arrived at the studio, which was now used only by her and Zhou Wen.
With only the two of them left, Chi Sheng finally could breathe a sigh of relief, but he saw Zhou Wen’s face full of hesitation.
Chi Sheng sat up straight and looked at her. Zhou Wen glanced outside the door; it was class time, so no one was passing by, but she still stood up and cautiously walked over to Chi Sheng.
Chi Sheng had already guessed something; her face suddenly turned as white as snow, and she looked up at Zhou Wen.
“You…” Zhou Wen started to speak, but seeing her ugly expression, she suddenly had the illusion that if she told her, her tender back would be completely crushed.
Zhou Wen hesitated for a moment, then spoke up: “Your situation has been found out.”
Even though she had expected it, Chi Sheng still felt a rumbling collapse inside her heart. She stared blankly ahead, and Zhou Wen looked at her with some pity.
The classmate who jumped off a building recently was from our class.
Chi Sheng’s gaze fell on her face.
Zhou Wen paused, ultimately not saying the three words “homosexuality.” Those three words carried too much weight, like a sharp blade stabbing into the listener’s heart.
This was only removed from the psychiatric manual in the first half of this year, so it’s no longer considered a psychological disorder. The school can’t use this to trouble you. That classmate of ours was asked to drop out because he was falling behind in his studies, and with other students pointing fingers and saying unpleasant things, he only…
It’s just that other classmates will look at you with biased eyes and put a lot of pressure on you, but as long as you don’t pay attention to them and endure it, it will eventually pass.
What Zhou Wen said carried a strong sense of consolation.
Chi Sheng was flustered and confused, yet strangely clear-headed. She keenly caught a somewhat official tone in Zhou Wen’s words and looked up to ask, “Did Teacher Kang make you say this?”
Zhou Wen was taken aback. She could see that Chi Sheng was very anxious—no one could remain calm in such a situation—but she still managed to grasp the most crucial point from just a few words.
Zhou Wen no longer beat around the bush and spoke directly: “Someone sent an anonymous letter to the school reporting this. Teacher Kang analyzed it and said the key issue is still the person who was with you. I heard she is involved in… This is a very serious conduct problem.”
Ruan Yinmeng…
Only the people of Pingcheng knew what Ruan Yinmeng used to do. Chi Shengxin’s heart sank as he thought of the people he encountered that morning.
“There is still room to turn things around. You should quickly cut ties with that person. Teacher Kang will help you secure this spot. You know how important the competition is; you need to prioritize,” Zhou Wen said, hitting the most crucial point.
The spot.
Chi Sheng immediately understood.
After that student jumped off the building, the entire campus was filled with voices discussing him. Everyone spoke without restraint, but when it came to Chi Sheng, probably because she was still alive, even if they criticized, it was at least behind her back.
Wherever Chi Sheng went, she felt countless pairs of eyes staring at her. When she returned to the dormitory, the chattering suddenly fell silent, and her roommates awkwardly turned their faces away, their gazes evasive.
The atmosphere was oppressive, so she had no choice but to leave.
As long as Ruan Yinmeng didn’t find out, it would be fine. Chi Sheng grasped the most crucial point amidst the chaos.
As for the quota, as for the competition, who cares.
She just won’t participate.
As for these classmates, if they want to discriminate, gossip, or exclude, let them be.
Anyway, she didn’t care.
She made a decision all at once. She had been scared for so long, her heart pounding ever since she saw that classmate fall right before her eyes. Now that it really happened, it was like that shoe finally hit the ground.
She was restless like a trapped beast, carrying a pride and aloofness that could abandon anything.
It would be fine as long as she had Ruan Yinmeng.
She walked through the school, not paying attention to the expressions of the people around her. Suddenly, her phone rang.
It was Ruan Yinmeng.
She hurriedly answered, holding the phone to her ear.
Chi Sheng.
As Ruan Yinmeng’s voice came through, Chi Sheng’s eyes suddenly welled up with tears. She immediately felt a wave of grievance and didn’t dare to say much, only responding with a soft, “Mm.”
“What happened? Why haven’t you come yet?” Ruan Yinmeng asked.
Only then did Chi Sheng remember that she had agreed with Ruan Yinmeng this morning to go home for dinner today. She had just completed a stage of practice, and Teacher Kang said she had made great progress. She was very happy and wanted to relax a bit.
“I’m at the school gate, I’m coming now,” Chi Sheng said hurriedly.
Ruan Yinmeng said, “Then watch the road carefully.”
Chi Sheng only realized after hanging up that there were many unread messages and missed calls.
She just glanced at them and didn’t bother, heading straight out of the school.
She wanted to go home, to be by Ruan Yinmeng’s side.
But someone, ungrateful and meddlesome, insisted on interfering.
Chi Sheng met Su Miaomiao at the entrance of the residential area.
Su Miaomiao was obviously waiting here to catch someone, but Chi Sheng didn’t even look at her, thinking indifferently, “Good, now I don’t have to avoid you all anymore.”
She walked past Su Miaomiao, who called her name and hurriedly grabbed her.
Chi Sheng looked at her coldly and pulled her hand away.
“It wasn’t me who said it!” Su Miaomiao panicked and hurriedly denied, “It was Tao Ping who asked Zhang Lie… I only found out something was wrong today when the counselor called me in for questioning.”
Only a few people knew about this matter, and they found out by asking each other.
“Whether it was you or not doesn’t matter anymore. Don’t come to me again.” Chi Sheng had no intention of arguing with her and walked straight past her.
Su Miaomiao hurriedly followed up: “Chi Sheng…”
Chi Sheng stopped walking and pointed at the community gate: “Not seeing you off.”
Su Miaomiao was stunned by her ruthless dismissal, staring at her in disbelief.
Chi Sheng was indifferent and about to leave. Su Miaomiao took a deep breath, her tone turning cold: “I just want to tell you something, then I’ll leave. Otherwise, I’ll go find her.”
On winter nights, people all head out braving the cold wind, burying their heads as they hurry along.
They stood in the shadow of a corner by the roadside; passersby who weren’t paying attention wouldn’t notice anyone was there.
Su Miaomiao saw that Chi Sheng’s patience was running out, so she didn’t dawdle and spoke directly: “I asked around the courtyard. As long as you cut ties with that woman, the spot will still be yours.”
Chi Sheng listened in confusion—since when did anyone have the right to boss her around?
She asked calmly, “Are you finished speaking?”
She looked stubborn and unyielding, and Su Miaomiao anxiously grabbed her clothes: “If you change now, it’s still not too late.”
Like the last straw that breaks the camel’s back, Chi Sheng’s emotions, suppressed all day, suddenly wavered and could no longer be controlled by reason.
She spoke, her eyes heavy: “What did I do wrong? Who did I harm? I never thought this was something shameful, it’s you all who are too annoying!”
She lost her temper, and as her words fell, the anger in her eyes had not yet faded, staring straight at Su Miaomiao.
Su Miaomiao seemed frightened by her; she took a step back, her expression shifting, and finally a cold smile lingered on her lips: “You’re not wrong?”
Her tone rose sharply, as if mocking.
Chi Sheng immediately felt it was pointless, what was there to say to her.
She turned to leave, but Su Miaomiao spoke again: “Aren’t you afraid of getting dirty?”
These words made all the blood in Chi Sheng’s body suddenly turn cold. She gritted her teeth and viciously spat out one word: “Get out!”
Su Miaomiao didn’t move, her eyes cold and indifferent, as if she hadn’t heard, and continued with a mix of doubt and disdain: “People like her, no matter where they go, their past will always be dug up. Who knows how many people have…”
Chi Sheng suddenly pushed her, cutting off her words.
She was trembling with anger, and even in the dark, the fierceness on her face was visible. Su Miaomiao suddenly felt that if she didn’t leave soon, Chi Sheng might actually lay hands on her.
She looked at her with a mixture of disappointment and resentment, then finally left.
After she walked away, Chi Sheng felt completely drained, took a step back unsteadily, and leaned against the wall behind him. He bent over, his chest heaving violently, unable to calm down no matter what. He wanted to shout, to run, to vent, but he couldn’t do anything.
He bit down hard on the back of his hand, almost drawing blood.
Suddenly, someone appeared in front of her.
Chi Sheng looked up in a daze; it was Ruan Yinmeng, who had come down without her noticing.
A surge of bitter tears suddenly welled up. Chi Sheng’s nose tingled with acidity. She opened her mouth, but fearing Ruan Yinmeng would worry, she lowered her head and roughly wiped her eyes, trying to suppress the tears. However, the next moment, she fell into a warm embrace.